The Illegal Banning of the Goan Kashti  

 Santosh Helekar

President Pandurang Fernandes, the President of Independent Republic of Chimbel is concerned about the new developments in Bittonna Beach. Kashti is our national dress, and nobody has the right to ban it on any beach. It has always protected everything that we stand behind while revealing most of what we sit on.

The kashti will always secure what lies in front of us - our future, and at the same time, provide us full knowledge of and free access to what lies behind us - our past.

If there has ever been a national symbol that has stood for security without compromising individual freedom, it has been the kashti. The security it imposes on our most precious possessions is very tight - sometimes so tight that the common thread that runs through our national fabric has to be loosened from time to time. To brandish our freedom it wedges itself between the domes of our democracy that form the very foundation of our backbone.

That is why this Bittonna Beach law to arrest anyone who walks with clothes that cover less than one third of his bottom is offensive to us. We will use all force from the bottom of our stomach to overturn this law, even if it means going on a unilateral pre-emptive strike in all of Chimbel.

Both our upper and lower tavernas have passed resolutions to give force to our President Pandurang to give the President of Bittonna whatever bhairi he wants to give him, whenever he wants to give it, and wherever he wants to give it. No prescription is needed for this bhairi from anybody. But, since President Pandurang wants to change the regime in Bittona, he will meet with the vhodlo dotor from Bittonna to ask what bhairi regime their President is already on before changing the regime.

Our President has vowed to use all his force against any evildoer who challenges our ways of guarding our weapons of mass destruction, and who threatens the freedom of our pillars of posterity.

Under whatever circumstation he will fight for our kashti.

Press Release from the Dhovi Khopti
Independent Republic of Chimbel
 

Santosh Helekar
October 21, 2002

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